3 Reasons Your Dream Isn't Working
This week's post is starring: Y-O-U! No, really, today I'm sharing off 3 reasons you told me why you're not pursuing your dream and what I have to say about them.
Dreams are in our hearts because we are called to pursue them. I'm passionate about encouraging women in pursuing their dreams because the world needs what each of us has to offer. If you've ever felt like doubt or fear is keeping you from pursuing what's on your heart, this post is for you!
Keep reading this post to learn:
⋒ 3 major roadblocks that keep women from pursuing their dreams and what you can do to overcome each one
01. It’s been done before.
Man oh man, when I hear someone say that they can’t pursue a dream because it’s been done before, all of me wants to reach out and put my hands on either side of their shoulders, look into their eyes, and passionately tell them: Yes but it hasn’t been done by you.
I know that might sound incredibly cheesy to some but let me tell you something - it’s powerful when you really break it down.
There is literally not another human on this planet who is wired exactly like you. You were created so purposefully. You were designed with gifts that are unique to you. You were knit together in your mother’s womb with a personality like no one else’s. That is incredibly miraculous!
Let me tell you something else – literally, everything under the sun has been done before in one way or another. There is nothing new popping up. Ideas and things are just evolving so that should take a whole lot of pressure off of you to think that the only way you can pursue a dream is if you have this brand new, groundbreaking, earth-shattering idea.
Here’s what I think: if a dream finds its way into your heart and it just won’t go away - as in - you can’t stop thinking about it - I think it’s there because you’re meant to pursue it.
Do you know how many paper planners companies there are in the world? I really don’t even know but I can guess there are hundreds of thousands, if not millions – I don’t know, I’m not the best at estimating but we can all agree there are so many planner companies out there.
Before I started the Hustle Sanely paper product line, I was very stuck in the “it’s already been done before” way of thinking.
I was thinking about how the world didn’t need another planner to choose from when there are people like Erin Condren and Emily Ley out there. What did I have to offer that they weren’t already doing?
But then I paused and realized that I have a story, experiences to share, that neither of them has. Experiences that other people out there could relate to, resonate with, and grow from me sharing.
I imagined helping just one busy woman get clear on her vision, defining her priorities, and creating a schedule and routines to support those priorities. I imagined teaching that one woman how to pursue her big goals while prioritizing her mental health and the important relationships in her life. I imagined the heaviness of overwhelm leaving her, her eyes getting that sparkle back, and her showing up and living in alignment with the vision she has for her life. That right there is what made me show up even though I started off afraid that I was doing what had already been done before.
So if you’re struggling with pursuing your dream because it’s been done before, here is my advice to you:
Get clear on who you want to serve through your dream and how you can start doing that right now.
For me, that looked like creating a planner that supported a specific lifestyle that I teach others how to live. That’s what sets Hustle Sanely apart from other planner companies. I am what sets Hustle Sanely apart from other planner companies.
I couldn’t afford to start a paper planner line right away so I started how I could – by making digital planning products. I knew the impact that I wanted to make and I started right where I was at and you can do that, too!
You’re allowed to work your way up to your dream. You’re not expected to go from crawling to sprinting in a week. Don’t put that expectation on yourself – respect the process of starting!
02. My dream is too small/it doesn’t matter enough.
First of all, says who? There is no rule book that dictates what qualifies a dream as big enough. It is up to you how much your dream matters.
It makes my heart so sad when I hear people say that they don’t think their dream of raising a family is enough. Listen to me right now: comparing your dreams with others’ dreams or with some made-up standards that the world has led you to believe are valid is not the vibe okay.
The way I see it, as long as you are stewarding well the dream that is in your heart then you are doing work that matters!
Here are some examples of dreams that matter a lot (and no, this isn’t an exhaustive list):
⋒ Starting a non-profit to help people without homes in your community
⋒ Raising babies into people of integrity who are assets to their community as they get older
⋒ Writing a book that shares the stories of people who have overcome hardships
⋒ Starting a YouTube that shares your journey of getting into SLP grad school with the intention of helping others do the same (sound familiar? Tbt, lol)
⋒ Working at a coffee shop with the intention of getting to know people in your community
⋒ Creating a peaceful home environment so you can invite people in for meals
I could go on and on! Dreams don’t have to be these singular things either - your dream can be creating a life that aligns with your vision! Maybe that’s waking up every day to go work at a 9-5 that you really enjoy and creating an incredible home life. I feel like we are so often pressured by social media - that the only dreams that matter are building empires or creating waves in big industries but that’s trash. You do not have to do either of those things to have a dream-worthy of pursuing.
If you’re struggling with not pursuing your dream because you think it’s too small or doesn’t matter enough, here is my advice to you:
Write down why the dream is important to you and then write an impact statement. How do you know this dream is going to help or serve others (even in small ways). You can make just about any dream impactful!
I know you’ve heard of the ripple effect. Maybe your dream is going to help 5 people in your community right now. But you have to think about those 5 people going and helping 5 people each because of what they learned from you and then those 5 people going and helping 5 people each and so on. That just took your impact from 5 to 55. I think math is not my jam, lol. But you get what I’m saying!
And remember this – it’s not always about how many people you impact but about how deeply you impact them.
03. I don’t know what step to take to do what I want to do.
And to this I say: Girl, have you heard of Google? I had 0% of an idea about what I was doing when I started Hustle Sanely®. When it comes to pursuing your dreams, you’ve got to be okay with figuring things out as you go.
To be honest, half the time, I didn’t know that I didn’t know how to do something until I was faced with it. And then when I was faced with it, I’d figure it out. That’s a lot more sustainable than trying to figure out every little detail right out the gate.
I really think for most of us, myself included, that if we saw all that went into making our big picture dreams come to life, we would run and hide. Our brains can only handle so much so instead of creating resistance and working against that, let’s focus on small steps that we can take, one at a tie, to move in the direction of our dreams.
If you don’t know how to do something, type it in Google and I can almost guarantee that a YouTube video or blog post will pop up walking you through at least part of what you need to do to get the ball rolling.
There is a plethora of free knowledge on the internet so saying that you don’t know where to start, to me, is you choosing to stay stuck. Ask yourself why you’re letting not knowing what to do first or next keep you stuck when you have access to the internet?
What’s the deeper issue here? Are you scared of being judged by your family for pursuing this dream? Are you afraid you’re going to lose a lot of time and money? Are you afraid of success even – that your dream is going to explode into something you didn’t expect?
If you’re struggling with not pursuing your dream because you don’t know what step to take, here is my advice to you:
Get out your laptop and Google “How to start X” – read a few articles and watch a few videos. Even if they don’t seem exactly relevant to the dream that you’re trying to pursue they’re going to get your wheels turning.
Once your wheels are turning, get out a piece of paper (or a Google doc for my digital babes) and start brain dumping any and everything that you can think of that has to do with steps you need to take to make your dream happen. Don’t worry about the steps being in order or anything like that. Just create a list of things you know you can do and then go ahead and make a list of things you know you need to do but don’t know how to do too so you can start figuring stuff out.
Once we start chunking our dreams like, we make them more digestible. When you stare at the big umbrella dream so like for me: start a paper planner line it feels massive and sure, you don’t know where to sink your teeth in.
I have this visual of trying to bite into a huge burger – the ones that have like 4 patties, bacon, lettuce, tomato, cheese, french fries, pickles, and all kinds of stuff packed between those 2 buns. It’s really hard to take a bite out of that burger. But if you grab a knife and cut the burger in half it’s easier to eat. You know where to sink your teeth. That’s what you’ve got to do with your dreams!
I teach this in detail in The Dream It. Do It. Workshop but take that umbrella dream and break it into 3-4 big, broad action steps and then take those big broad action steps and break them down into 3-4 nitty-gritty action steps.
If you need help with how to do this, go listen to episode 112 of the podcast – I walk you through a very specific example!
I’m just so passionate about helping women see that they were created on purpose for a purpose. Your gifts are needed to make the world better. Stop settling, stop making excuses, and step into the woman you are called to be! No one is going to force you to show up for your life. It’s on you if you choose to float through each day feeling trapped by the mundane – do something about it!
Just because things have always been a certain way in your life doesn’t mean you have to keep doing them that way. You can break out of the mold – start a new cycle. Be an action-taking woman!
“I hope you’re seeing a pattern here – the small actions that you take every day really do add up and make your life easier in the long run. ”
Need some help getting clear on your dreams and creating a plan to make them happen?
If you enjoyed this blog post, tune into episode 117 of The Hustle Sanely Podcast to dive deeper into this topic:
